H.P. Lovecraft’s First Day as a Substitute Teacher at Arkham Junior High School. By Daniel Casey. On McSweeney’s Internet Tendency.

A word of caution, children, before we discuss the arcane contents of this stygian course: some mathematics were not meant for man to understand. This is Cartesian devilry of a black and necromantic sort, dreamed up by the twisted designs of sinister scholastic gods, existing purely to tempt and destroy mankind with its elusive secrets.…